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Hi ~

I'm sulking inside of myself about the term "financial wellness" now. It sounds so bright and plastic and nonsensical and vapid to me for now, placed against the background of, you snowglobe shakeup.

So I'll just sort of ignore FW as a "thing" with a "logo" but I still have lots to tell you all so here we go.

A) How are you doing? Really...  I mean, really... holy crap this thing is really something beyond all the beyonds I've ever lived through.

B) Not sure if Passover or Easter being so different this year was hard or better for you, or even both, but whichever way it went, you're reading this now so you made it through. Phew. Good job.

C) Lists always make me feel better. Thanks for pulling a list out of me.

D) Have you checked yourself for any withdrawal symptoms? Even with no c-word in your family or friends, life turned on a dime for so many of us. I finally put my finger on it tonight that I am going through withdrawal. From non-addictive things, but still, the withdrawal process is a good one to get space from when possible. I had misassigned the assumption of early PMS to feeling grumpy, entitled, craving (but couldn't get satisfied), hopelessness, impatience, frustration. Usually I like to have those difficulties take turns but they all took the stage together for days on end. Sheesh. I want my money back for that ticket. When I'm in withdrawal from something I was hooked on or leaning on heavily, I'm a cranky fussy baby in an adult's body. It's adult colic. Nothing seems to work until I tire myself out completely.

People suddenly going full speed ahead with kids home all the time, may be in withdrawal from routine and having any alone time.

People who were dating and looking for their life partner may be in withdrawal from making progress towards finding their person. Jeez, going cold turkey off of dates in person is a thiiiiing. Legit tough. Even if dating itself can also be legit tough!! 

Healthcare professionals may be in withdrawal from missing just the formerly usual-level-challenging, heart-breaking, sometimes under-resourced and under-appreciated longass days of work. 

(OK, had to stop and cry at that one. OMG so touching)

People who had a steady paycheck disappear, temporarily or not, can feel the Earth's floor may have been jerked out from under them. Plenty of people were putting up with a sucky job for them, in exchange for the reliability of that steady paycheck. SO tough and scary and destablizing. Can be hard to not take it personally (or, at least it has been for me. I literally take the world crisis personally from time to time. Like business got less steady AT me). 

OK, full disclosure that even thinking about this next one has brought hot stinging tears into my eyes. As many of you know, we lost my Dad a year ago. I am so so glad that my brother and Mom live close to each other. AND knowing she is at her house by herself while a pandemic rages through Georgia really gets my goat. It's like I'm in withdrawal for thinking I could just fly there any time if if gets really really bad. I was supposed to be flying there to visit with them this week, actually. I know I'll be able to get there someday, but will it be in time enough before we maybe lose her too? (That's the new classic thought record my mental DJ spins around 2 or 3am when I've forgotten that thinkythinkythinkymaybemaybefuture is not a fun game to play alone in the dark.)

OK if I keep going with this thread I'm going to get a therapy invoice from the dedicated readers. I'm not going to say "be kind", even though it's not a bad idea. I'm not going to say "be accepting of yourself and others, we're all going through a hard time", even though I'm striving for it even as I fall short. I'm not going to say, "let yourself feel all the feelings 'cause you'll have to feel them sooner or later anyway", even though the efficiency Qween in me likes to get right down to feeling business whenever she can.

I'll just say "be you".
I've been screen-time curfewing each night, and thanks to my accountability partner in that quest. He wrote about it in his mindfulness newsletter. Ask me if you want to see it; sending it to you will give me something constructive to do. : )

My witching hour of 10:59pm is quickly arriving so I'll just send you some things I've been finding useful. Take what you like and leave the rest as "they" say in 12 Step meetings.

Oh! Speaking of! If you have been wanting to get to an Al-Anon meeting because someone is either working your last nerve OR you want to control the whole world and you find that you cannot, here is the link for how to get on Zoom meetings for the Marin County meetings. Just drop in to any of them when it works for your schedule.

If you noticed the HFA in the newsletter title, here is the Easter Egg. "High Functioning Anxiety". Wheeee! Saw this video tonight and it changed my life for the best. I scored 11 out of 12. Wheeeeagain! Not that I'm talking about "FW" directly but this video helped put into perspective that the resurgence of anxiety about money is not actually about money. (I'm aware that for some people it is both about the money AND not entirely about the money. But for me, there hasn't been enough change to warrant near panic attacks again almost every day. Sheesh. But, back to that shaken up snowglobe. Legit.)

I HIGHLY recommend the podcast "This Is Uncomfortable".  Check out the Zoom Therapy in a Pandemic episode for an excellent description of financial therapy and some tips.

And this is rando but I love it. My friend and beloved client is a rehab and holistic veterinarian. Usually people have to go to Pacifica, CA, to work with her. Now, she is offering telemedicine appointments and she is fantastic. An absolute encyclopedia along with warm, caring bedside manner. Here is the website in case you or anyone with animals have questions about behavior, nutrition, pain management, or home exercises. (And, honestly, I just like looking through all the pictures and stories on the site just for fun. Have you ever seen a goat in a goat cart before?! I hadn't either.)
Email Me If You'd Like to Say Things
Beth's Perfectly Imperfect Website
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