Marriage Minute: Managing Conflict
From The Gottman Institute
Generally, people think the goal of conflict is winning. If you’re winning, your partner is losing. And if your partner is losing, the relationship is losing. The goal of conflict is understanding. Understanding doesn’t mean you agree, which is okay because you don’t need to resolve your conflicts. You just need to manage them.
So the next time you feel yourself getting frustrated, instead of digging in and defending your position, stop and say, “Help me understand.” This turns conflict into connection.